Afters finished?

Hi Everyone

Attached is the second draft of our paper. Thanks for the comments on the blog and the new and revised bits added/moved on the Google doc. I've tried to keep everyone's comments/contributions in mind again, and what you'll notice is the following...

What's new:
1) a revised, shorter introduction based on Rachel's rewrite and bits of comments from others. It's shorter, is more food focused - e.g. some key themes are in there - plus it summarises / condenses the main contributions about blogging (now gone, but soon to surface in the 'Writing collaboration' paper) + comments on draft one that were posted on the blog.

2) a new 'endings?' section comprising fragments of people's ideas about (not) concluding, mainly from the comments on the first draft. Hope this works...

3) a shorter paper: now 7,800 words long. The long intro fragments on the blogging process have been summarised and/or edited out (to be added to the 'Writing collaboration' online-paper...) I think this is ready to submit at this length, and we'll see what Roger Lee says about this.

4) author order: previously it was alphabetical by first name, now it is in order of appearance.

Concerns?
Just one for me: two people mentioned that they thought that otherness and viscerality were a bit unbalanced. I would welcome some specific suggestions about what might be added/subtracted where. Please amend the Google doc and tell me!

[Also, there are empty spaces in the text which the copyeditor will hopefully sort out so that the columns can go over the page]

Suggestions?
Maybe we should just submit and iron out any smaller issues (that balance bit) when Roger gets back with comments. Comments and suggestions to this email list please...

Finally: thanks yet again to everyone and apologies for dragging this out so long.

Phew

Ian

new intro

hi everyone,

I tried writing an intro (Damien mentions this) using some of Ian's original call plus my own attempt to deal with the content. It's underlined to indicate new text in the google doc. The last paragraph of this intro could perhaps be moved to the end to function as a conclusion (with tense changes).

I tried to work with Jean's headings but I gave up on that. Just couldn't make them work for equal amounts of text.

I also deleted the section on blogging (in red) to try to lower the word count. Ian has another paper in which these comments on blogging can appear.

best, Rachel